I watched a show and a statement left a mark. ‘You don’t get what you want, you get who you are.” Seems unfair as we have been groomed to think we should get what we want. You can want all the money in the world but who are you deep inside? Understanding who we are without the money is relevant now as we try to make do with little, and others live in the fear of having less. I have gone to school and done many courses in my life but the day I found my bank balance at Sh200 was one of the biggest lessons in my life.
I remember trying to escape that feeling of hopelessness by binging on TV shows. I recall the shame I felt when my friends had to pick up the tab and asking my Dad to help me with rent. Combine this with the fact that I had closed down my first business. Yet all this happened when my day to day job was advising people where to invest. Knowledge and title do not make you rich.
In this period, I realise that what is affecting people is deeper than money. There are increased cases of depression. People don’t even know how to look at their families, their kids in the face. We have never been taught to cope with not knowing the answer.
In the never-ending striving to make more, we started thinking that money makes us more human. It gives us relevance. Then we end up playing a game in which we never quite “catch up”. Even when you have it you keep thinking it’s a bigger amount that will make you happy. When you don’t have it, you feel inadequate. This is the thinking that has made us follow the wrong jobs or careers, start business with wrong motives, marry the wrong people, and have been blinded to real opportunities. Money is not the answer to our problems, identity is.
How to get your true identity:
Money has stopped us from taking responsibility. Let’s investigate the thought ‘I can’t start a business because I don’t have money”. You then stop considering it and it becomes your reality. Then you can blame money and be a victim. This thought process affects our goals and desires. We don’t even ask for help because we are afraid of how we will look. We can’t attend certain forums because we are afraid that we don’t look the part. We fail to save and invest because of today’s reality. I am not saying you don’t t have to figure out money – yes you do. But, many times we are running away from possible rejection, risks, what other people think, having to confront our insecurities, mistakes we have made, and fear of not having all these things that we have used to create an image for ourselves. It’s easier to let money be the problem than face all this.
Do you feel superior or inferior because you have less? Now, this is where I am asking you to go against the grain. Society will make you feel good when you have and bad when you don’t. The anchor has to be who you are and not your position to others. We don’t spend time developing or understanding that. That’s why when you have had a big job title you can’t see the new opportunity is in making snacks because you are after opportunities that conform to an image. If I know I am a creative person, I can apply it in whichever circumstance. I am not less or more creative because of money.
What do you truly want? Do you want that house or have you been taught to want that house? Is maintaining the car the reason you don’t travel, invest, or start a business? The reason many people cannot even in this period let go and adjust is that they are hanging onto things and circumstances that they are expected to want. Is it really make or break if your kids go to that particular school? Paying school fees does not necessarily make you a better parent. Money does not have the power to fulfill so figure out what truly does. Money is a tool.
I started a business advising people about money with no money. My ability to learn and communicate outweighed the bank account. When you peel back that onion, who are you without the money, job title, and all these other identities that we shackle ourselves with?
You can get Waceke’s book ‘Making Cents’ by order through www.centonomy.com and on Amazon.
Singer speaks after attacking lover at WCB signee Zuchu’s star-studded concert
56 minutes ago
On 18 July, there was fanfare at the Mlimani City Hall in Dar es Salaam as WCB signee Zuchu held a thanksgiving concert months after her debut EP, I Am Zuchu. The event dubbed ‘Ahsante Nashukuru’ mainly featured performances by artistes from the WCB stable and attracted the whos-who in the Tanzanian entertainment and political scenes.
However, singer Gigy Money who also performed made the headlines for the wrong reasons after getting into a scuffle with her lover during the much-publicised concert.
READ ALSO: I was bewitched by a friend – Gigy Money
Peaceful arrival, later chaos
Moments earlier, Gigy and her Nigerian man were seen arriving arm in arm at the event whose highlight featured Zuchu receiving a brand new car from WCB head honcho Diamond Platnumz. Donning matching outfits, the couple was spotted on the red carpet as the paparazzi scrambled to capture the moment. However, all hell breaks loose later and viral videos depict the visibly angered Nigerian arguing with a bouncer at the entrance. After a tense confrontation, Gigy’s man is seen being led by the screaming bouncer towards the exit. Shortly after, a similarly irritated Gigy emerges and follows the pair.
“Gigy! Wewe Gigy wewe!” a woman in the background is heard dissuading the singer from pursuing them but the singer pays no heed and heads for the pair.
“You want to beat me?” the boyfriend is heard asking an approaching Gigy as the bouncer acts as a barrier between them. The bouncer manages to steer the incensed man towards the exit as Gigy follows behind, hurling obscenities.
At some point, a barefoot Gigy turns into a sprint before throwing one of her shoes which hits the man who then responds with an insult. Another bouncer finally intervenes and the two are separated. Gigy then asks for her vehicle so she can head home before warning the press against sharing videos of the incident.
Though the cause of their tiff is still unknown Gigy later made reference to the shocking incident in a social media post, hinting that alcohol had a part to play in the fracas. In another post, Gigy shared a photo alongside her estranged lover writing: “My mad man looked handsome before his demons arose and mine arose too.”
‘Running over Ali Kiba’
Gigy is not new controversy and recently said she’d run over her ex, singer Ali Kiba for breaking her heart.
“I will knock all of them down, I mean I will kill them. In fact, I will flatten them like chapatis. The first person I will knock down and kill is Ali Kiba. Actually, I don’t need a weak car, I need a Fuso so that when I knock him down I will be sure he doesn’t survive,” Gigy told Ayo TV.
Dating Kiba brothers
Gigy had in the past admitted to dating both Ali Kiba and his younger brother, Abdu Kiba. She solely laid the blame on Chekecha singer for pursuing her despite knowing that she’d been with his younger brother. Abdu expressed being heartbroken after learning the two had a fling, prompting him to marry.
“I was very hurt on hearing that Ali was dating Gigy Money because I dated her first before she became famous. But it’s alleged that Ali didn’t know. It hurt me for a while till when I married,” said Abdu.
Defunct Nairobi County Council Nurses Go On Strike, Citing Discrimination By The Government
Why Jahmby Kokai is happy her TV anchor dream never came true
37 minutes ago
Popular media personality Jahmby Koikai narrated how her first attempt at auditioning as a TV host backfired and she was sent home on the first day of the audition. Reliving her prime days, Jahmby narrated how she was determined to follow her dream of becoming a news anchor after completing her degree.
“There was a reality show that was running on one major TV channel here in Kenya, searching for the next top news anchor. I’ve always had the knack for news. At the time, I was working at Metro FM. Walked to my boss and asked him if he was ok with me participating in this competition. He agreed to it.
“Auditions were at Film Studios. The queue stretched all the way to the showground. I was at the back kabisa. Imagine 300 people before you. Then we got the briefing paper and it indicated, ‘no persons with experience in a media house allowed to participate in this audition’. Mimi Jahmby Koikai, nirudi home after watu 300 kukuwa mbele yangu?” she posed.
According to the endometriosis survivor, she went ahead to audition for the position despite the warning and was the first contestant to be sent packing.
“So I stayed in line until I got to the audition room. The judges were a few people I was in campus with. I felt a wave of despair. Like I’m here auditioning, yet my classmates will be judging me? I did my thing and I was considered. We got into the house and we were assigned to different groups. I was the group leader and we won the challenge. Later that evening, we were driven back to Film Studios for a briefing. The presenter of the show said some of us have to go home.
“My name was called out first amongst other great people. We were dropped home. I cried. It felt like I’d lost such a great opportunity. My mom and late grandma were so sad cos they loved to watch me do the news,” she narrated.
Later, Jahmby auditioned for another TV opportunity only to miss out as well.
“Then came another opportunity over 10 years ago, I saw a TV ad and decided to apply for the news anchor position. I didn’t get the job.”
However, due to endometriosis, Jahmby was forced to put her dreams on hold and concentrate on getting better. According to her, it is as though God had better plans for her and is grateful to not have gotten the jobs.
“I battled severe endometriosis in silence for over 19 years. I think of how engaging the newsroom is and I’m grateful I wasn’t in that space. I’d have utilized all my sick-leaves and off-days and just declared redundant.”
There was a reality show that was running on one major TV channel here in Kenya, searching for the next top news anchor. I’ve always had the knack for news. At the time, I was working at Metro Fm. Walked to my boss and asked him if he was ok with me participating in this competition. He agreed to it. Auditions were at Film Studios. The queue stretched all the way to the showground. I was at the back kabisa. Imagine 300 people before you. Then we got the briefing paper and it indicated, ‘no persons with experience in a media house allowed to participate in this audition’. Mimi Jahmby Koikai, nirudi home after watu 300 kukuwa mbele yangu? Nikasema zi. So I stayed in line until I got to the audition room. The judges were a few people I was in campus with. I felt a wave of despair. Like I’m here auditioning, yet my classmates will be judging me? I did my thing and I was considered. We got into the house and we were assigned to different groups. I was the group leader and we won the challenge. Later that evening, we were driven back to Film Studios for a briefing. The presenter of the show said, some of us have to go home. My name was called out first amongst other great people. We were dropped home. I cried. It felt like I’d lost such a great opportunity. My mom and late grandma were so sad cos they loved to watch me do the news. Then came another opportunity over 10years ago, I saw a TV ad and decided to apply for the news anchor position. As you see in this pic, I got my hair done at Ralph’s Hair Salon, new suit etc. I didn’t get the job. After KBC, I never got to anchor the news again. I’m grateful I did not get the job even though I felt dejected at the time. I battled severe Endometriosis in silence for over 19years. I think of how engaging the newsroom is and I’m grateful I wasn’t in that space. I’d have utilised all my sick-leaves and off-days and just declared redundant. There are many people like me who are bound by chronic illness and cannot do the things they love. I share your pain. But there’s hope. I’m grateful to God for His reminder that He will restore to you all the years that the locusts have eaten. Also Jer 29:11